Note: Infertility can be an emotionally complex journey, often accompanied by feelings of stress and uncertainty. At Grain Fertility, we’re committed to providing resources that empower and support you through this process. This post is part of our Mindfulness and Fertility Treatment series in collaboration with Lily & Bee Fertility , where we will explore practical ways to reduce stress and foster emotional well-being. Other posts in this series include: Finding Clarity with a Fertility Vision Board: Tips From a Fertility Coach Escaping the Fertility Story Comparison Trap Finding Gratitude in the Middle of a Fertility Journey Fertility Journal Prompts to Help Cultivate Gratitude Becky Ackerman, founder of Lily & Bee Fertility Coaching , focuses on creating a thoughtful approach to mindfulness and fertility and has been a guiding light for many. With her permission, we’re thrilled to share her insights with you. Maintaining A Positive Mindset Is Hard, But Essential One of the hardest, but most important things you can do when working through fertility issues is maintaining a positive mindset. Fertility journey's are never linear and often come with disappointment, unexpected twists, and failure. Through it all, trying to remain positive and optimistic can be difficult. To help, here are three tricks that can quickly improve your outlook and help keep your positive fertility mindset. It can be hard to stay positive during fertility treatment. Stop Thinking of Yourself as Infertile Labels can be dangerous. They may not seem terribly important on the surface, but they can carry implication and subtext. Unfortunately, your subconscious brain is tuned into it all. Being labeled "infertile" brings implications that you are broken, your body doesn't work right, and that you never going to be able to have a child. Why would you want to carry all of that around? Do we label cancer patients or diabetics this way? Both are diseases like infertility, yet society has forced a stigma that often surrounds us throughout our journey. So, how do you change your thinking? First, a quite from Dr. Randine Lewis' book, The Infertility Cure. “There is no such thing as infertility; it is a myth! Rarely have I met a woman of childbearing age with all her reproductive organs intact who isn’t capable of bearing children. As long as the anatomical structures are present, a medical diagnosis of “infertility” is often a fallacy. Many factors can cause a woman to have difficulty conceiving, but once these factors are overcome and a woman’s body is restored to health, conception can occur naturally.” Instead of telling yourself that you are infertile, reassure yourself that you simply need help. It might take you and your doctors a few tries to figure out exactly how to help you achieve your goal, but eventually you will get there. Reframe "Trying to Conceive" or "Trying to Have a Baby" In Star Wars Episode 5: The Empire Strike Back, Master Yoda famously says "Do. Or do not. There is no try." Trying something means you might succeed but also means you may fail. Just like with labels, your brain subconsciously picks up on that negativity, which can create hesitancy, fear, stress, and other negative thoughts. While we know insurance and doctors often use the term "trying to conceive" and even within the infertility community, TTC is used all of the time, try to think about "working towards conceiving" or "working toward having a baby." The message your mind and body becomes that everything in your journey is a positive step in the right direction, bringing you closer to your goal. Make a Fertility Playlist This may sound silly but music is scientifically proven to impact our moods. Just Google "Happiest Songs According to Science," listen to them, and see how you feel. Odds are you know what song you want to listen to when you feel sad, or want to do an extra rep at the gym, or that tune that just makes you get up out of your seat and dance. Making a playlist, as cheesy as it sounds, can help you create a more positive fertility mindset. So, here are a few songs that science says are the happiest songs and some songs chosen by Becky Ackerman, founder of Lily & Bee Fertility Coaching: ‘Don’t Stop Me Now’ – Queen ‘Dancing Queen’ – ABBA ‘Good Vibrations’ – The Beach Boys ‘Uptown Girl’ – Billie Joel ‘Eye of the Tiger’ – Survivor ‘I’m a Believer’ – The Monkees ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’ – Cyndi Lauper ‘Livin’ on a Prayer’ – Bon Jovi ‘I Will Survive’ – Gloria Gaynor ‘Walking on Sunshine’ – Katrina & The Waves 'Roar'—Katy Perry 'Fight Song'—Rachel Platten 'I Will Survive'—Gloria Gaynor 'Unstoppable'—Sia 'Brave'—Sara Bareilles 'This Is Me'—The Greatest Showman soundtrack You Got This. But Grain Fertility Can Help. Improving your fertility mindset can help you manage the stress and uncertainty that comes with fertility treatment. However, we know at Grain Fertility, sometimes you need a little extra help. This is where we come in. Whether it is having a fertility nurse walk you through your protocol, help with medication storage, or you just want someone to talk through it all, our Patient Empowerment Coaches are here to support you in any way we can. Grain Fertility Patient Empowerment Coaches can help support your fertility journey.

“I can’t do this anymore. It is too hard.” IVF drop out rates mean tens of thousands of people quit before having a baby. This is something almost every single person who has gone through IVF has said to themselves or a loved one. It is understandable why someone would think this. Despite wanting so desperately to have a child, the mental, emotional, physical toll of IVF treatment can be too much. In the end, too many people stop IVF before having a baby. Every person in the fertility industry knows this. The question is why and what can be done about it? To first know why and what can be done, we need to understand what the actual rate is, which is not well understood. There are a few published studies that look at this topic, but what has been surprising is that many clinics do not do a good job of: keeping track of how many patients drop out and why they drop out. The reality is it is really hard to get information from someone when they leave a clinic. Most people don’t want to tell a business why they stopped using their product, especially when it is a difficult manner like trying to have a child. We believe getting at these root causes can help solve some major problems for both patients and clinics. Driving down the IVF dropout rate can help increase the number of individuals and couples who have a successful live birth. We know this because data shows the cumulative prognosis-adjusted live-birth rate across all cycles was 65.3% of women achieving a live birth by the sixth cycle (1) . This number is slightly higher (68%+) for women under age 40. This means if we can simply get someone to this number of cycles, we give them a good chance at success. It is good business for clinics to have their patients successfully give birth. While having longer duration patients will decrease the overall cycle success rate for a clinic (a metric measured by the CDC and SART), it increases the total number of cycles performed by a clinic and increases their total patient live birth success rate. The Real Numbers Behind the Dropout Crisis There are a few studies that examined the number of patients that quit IVF. More importantly, it is essential to understand how many of these patients quit of their own volition, and not due to medical or financial reasons. A late 90s study from the Netherlands found that the cumulative dropout rate after 3 cycles was 62%, and only 13.9% of these patients quit due to reasons outside of the patient control (2) . Another study found that the overall dropout rate of Boston IVF patients in the United States was 34% (IBID) . Another study showed 25% of patients discontinued fertility treatment without a pregnancy (3) . The wide range of dropout rates, averaging an approximate 35.5% dropout rate for patients, shows a few things. Even if these numbers are high, it is safe to say that over 1 in 4 people will quit IVF before having a baby due to non-medical or financial reasons. This means that of the over 400,000 IVF cycles performed in the United States and approximately 175,000 women undergoing IVF, around 43,750 of them will not have a baby. Imagine the entire crowd of Citizens Ballpark, home of the Philadelphia Phillies which fits 42,901 people, going through years of treatment, spending tens of thousands of dollars, and not having a child. This is how many people go through IVF every year and quit before having a baby. Thinking of this another way, this means that in the US alone, we can estimate over $2.8 billion is spent on IVF journeys that end without a child (average cost $21,600 total per cycle + 3 cycles average + 43,750 people quitting). Most People Don’t Quit IVF Because It’s Not Working or Costs Too Much—They Quit Because It’s Overwhelming. But what do people quit? Esteemed researcher Alice D. Domar, Ph.D, says “many health care professionals have the impression that IVF treatment is terminated for only three reasons: pregnancy, cost, or the refusal of the physician to continue treatment because of a poor treatment response or prognosis (active censoring)...However, research has shown that, in fact, a significant number of patients terminate treatment of their own volition and not for financial reasons." There has been so much talk recently of bringing down the cost of IVF in order to increase access and the declining birth rate, and while it is essential that we do this, it is important to focus on the main reasons people quit and address these root causes. Studies have shown that a majority of patients who quit of their own volition do so for several reasons (4,5,6) : the psychological burdens of treatment (classified as taking too much of a toll on a relationship or too anxious or depressed to continue), postponing treatment, emotional distress, financial, Organizational issues, and issues with their clinic Understanding the actual burdens of fertility treatment extend beyond the direct impact on medical care and follow a patient into their daily life. Recently, Maven Clinic published data that showed the impact fertility care has on a woman’s workplace and the data was striking. The study showed that 77% hid or downplayed fertility treatments at work, 44% turned down promotions, raises, or new job opportunities due to treatment schedules or concerns about future family planning, 91% said fertility challenges impacted their mental health, 59% of women or their partners took on extra work to pay for care (7) . It is also important to understand when someone drops out in addition to why someone stops treatment. This is harder data to come by but one study (8) showed the following stages of discontinuation: Stage I (immediately after first visit)- 6.0% Stage II (during diagnostic workup)- 3.4% Stage III (after finishing diagnostic workup but before treatment)- 35.7% Stage IV (during or after non-IVF treatment)- 23.5% Stage V (during IVF)- 17.9% and Stage VI (after at least 3 cycles of IVF)- 13.5% From the early stages of infertility treatment, data shows an immediate impact on patient mental and emotional health, taking a toll on their lives and adversely impacting their ability to maintain the lifestyle they had before treatment. It is why so many patients say infertility takes so much from you. It changes who you are because it impacts your schedule, your physical health, your relationships, and your finances. What Could Keep Patients Going? So what can we do to help decrease IVF dropout rates and increase the total number of live births via IVF? At Grain Fertility, we believe that providing patients with the support and resources from diagnosis and continuing through the fertility journey to live birth is one way we can help to decrease dropout rates. This is achieved several ways. Better explanation of what to expect Patients consistently tell us how overwhelmed they are by the process. It is simply too much to expect a patient who is struggling with a traumatic diagnosis such as infertility to also remember every detail they are given and adhere to a complex process. To address this, Grain Fertility patient empowerment coaches provide detailed explanations of what to expect throughout the journey, providing overviews of major procedures, making sure patients understand the steps they are required, and contextualizing their doctors decisions to help them make sense. We find this immediately helps to reduce the overwhelming nature of the treatment, helping to minimize some of the main contributors to drop out. More support between appointments While Grain Fertility coaching is built around preparing for milestones that induce the most anxiety and elicit the highest number of patient errors (such as trigger shots, retrievals, or transfers), we offer support to patients between their appointments, focusing on Stage III of the treatment process, which has the highest percentage of dropoffs. We believe by supporting a patient, helping address their concerns, and answering their questions, we can get a patient through the hardest parts of treatment and increase their chances of achieving a live birth. Organization and tools that reduce mental load While organizational issues are not a top contributor to patient drop out directly, we strongly believe it is a contributor to the overall toll it can take on a person, is a contributor to emotional distress, and an overall contributor to dropout. How anxious are you when your office is messy or your house is overflowing with bills and documents? There is a reason Marie Kondo’s organizational methods became so popular. We believe that by balancing a person’s desire to have the information they need, when they need it with the ability to keep it out of sight when they don’t, they can more effectively handle the impact treatments have. What Grain Fertility Does to Help Grain Fertility was created by patients and fertility professionals who understand the real burdens treatment places on people. Everything we do is designed to reduce that weight, so patients are more likely to stay in care and reach their goal of having a child. Comprehensive support is at the heart of our offering to fertility patients and clinics. Our one-on-one Patient Empowerment Coaching gives patients direct access to experienced fertility nurses who guide them through each step. We don’t replace clinical teams, we complement them. Coaches help patients understand procedures, prepare for milestones like trigger shots and retrievals, and clarify next steps after doctor visits. We also provide an easy-to-use app to keep key information such as medication instructions, insurance details, questions for the clinic in one place. It reduces the stress of managing treatment logistics and helps patients stay on track. Patients also receive personalized resources tailored to their treatment stage. Whether you’re about to start stimulation meds for the first time or considering what comes after a failed transfer, we help you prepare mentally and emotionally for what’s ahead. That preparation makes a difference. By combining experienced coaches, practical tools, and resources tailored to the IVF process, we help reduce the feelings of confusion, burnout, and anxiety that drive patients to stop treatment too soon. Empowerment Keeps People In Treatment When patients understand what’s happening, feel confident in their ability to manage the details, and know they have someone in their corner, they’re far more likely to stay the course. Support doesn’t change your diagnosis, but it changes your ability to face it. It’s clear that many people are not leaving fertility care because of medical failure or even cost. They’re leaving because the process is too hard to navigate alone. We believe that knowledge plus support leads to confidence and confidence keeps people in treatment. That’s why Grain focuses on empowerment. We help patients take the next step, even when it’s hard. We do this because every step brings them closer to the goal they’ve been working toward. If you’re a patient and want to learn how coaching can support your journey, schedule a free discovery call . If you’re a clinic leader looking to improve retention, patient satisfaction, and outcomes, we’d love to talk about how we can partner together . Grain Fertility Helps Support Patients and Clinics. Citations: Smith ADAC, Tilling K, Nelson SM, Lawlor DA. Live-Birth Rate Associated With Repeat In Vitro Fertilization Treatment Cycles. JAMA. 2015 Dec 22-29;314(24):2654-2662. doi: 10.1001/jama.2015.17296. PMID: 26717030; PMCID: PMC4934614. Alice D. Domar, Ph.D., Kristin Smith, Lisa Conboy, Sc.D., Marie Iannone, M.S., and Michael Alper, M.D. A prospective investigation into the reasons why insured United States patients drop out of in vitro fertilization treatment. Fertility and Sterility Vol. 94, No. 4, September 2010. Collura, Barbara et al.Factors associated with a patient’s decision to discontinue fertility treatment before achieving pregnancy.Fertility and Sterility, Volume 112, Issue 3, e400 Domar et al. A prospective investigation into the reasons why insured United States patients drop out of in vitro fertilization treatment. Gameiro S, Boivin J, Peronace L, Verhaak CM. Why do patients discontinue fertility treatment? A systematic review of reasons and predictors of discontinuation in fertility treatment. Hum Reprod Update. 2012 Nov-Dec;18(6):652-69. doi: 10.1093/humupd/dms031. Epub 2012 Aug 6. PMID: 22869759; PMCID: PMC3461967. Collura, Barbara et al.Factors associated with a patient’s decision to discontinue fertility treatment before achieving pregnancy. https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/maven-clinic-study-pulls-back-the-curtain-on-the-staggering-financial-and-emotional-costs-of-fertility-care-302431182.html?tc=eml_cleartime Brandes M, van der Steen JO, Bokdam SB, Hamilton CJ, de Bruin JP, Nelen WL, Kremer JA. When and why do subfertile couples discontinue their fertility care? A longitudinal cohort study in a secondary care subfertility population. Hum Reprod. 2009 Dec;24(12):3127-35. doi: 10.1093/humrep/dep340. Epub 2009 Sep 26. PMID: 19783833.

The impact of fertility treatment can be overlooked and minimized. You Are Ready To Start Fertility Treatment. But Are You Ready For Everything Else? In 2016, when founder Joe Cody's wife was diagnosed with infertility, he immediately started doing research before starting fertility treatment. He was searching for information like: What was the process like and how long did it take? Well, a simple internet search found that while the IVF cycle itself only takes around 4 weeks, the full process can take up to 4 months. That isn’t awful. What is the success rate for a couple our age with our health history? Well, we plugged our information into the CDC IVF Success Estimator and found an approximate 58% chance of success with 1 cycle and an astounding 86% chance of live birth with 3 cycles. Again, that isn’t bad. How much will I have to pay out of pocket compared to what benefits through our employer will cover? This one hurt a little more. Our diagnosis required the use of donor eggs so insurance wasn’t going to cover that. And I soon realized medication, some testing, and other components wouldn’t be covered. However, being from Maryland, I knew that we had 3 cycles or $100,000 in benefits, which could cover a large portion of our treatment. We were lucky. We could afford this. Time to get started. I was naive. Based on all of this, I thought that we would be done within a year. I assumed even if each cycle took up to 4 months, we could get 3 done in 1 year. Our insurance would cover up to 3 cycles and if those 3 didn’t work, we could switch to my insurance to get another 3 chances. Worst case scenario, we are pregnant and have a child in 2 years with cycles left over to have more than 1 kid. Grain Fertility can help you prepare for fertility treatment. What You Expect vs What Really Happens In reality, it took almost one full year to have our first failed transfer. It took multiple months to get everything set up with our first clinic. Then, my wife had multiple cycles stopped due to fluid build up and possible ovarian cysts. It took time for our doctor to adjust medications to get the right combination of luck and skill to have her body respond like it needed to. After each failed round, you want to get started immediately to try again. You know the clock is ticking. You want answers why the last round didn’t work. I viewed our problem as an equation, solving for variables and finding missing pieces to make the puzzle fit. And through this all, I expected someone to be there every step of the way, answering questions, preparing us for the steps, and helping us feel confident and comfortable. What really happens is there often aren’t answers. Only educated guesses. And most of the work will fall on you. You don’t get as much time with clinical staff as you would like. You don’t get a detailed walk through of everything that is happening. Most of the journey falls on your shoulders. All of this leads to the overwhelming feelings of stress, isolation, and anxiety that so many fertility patients encounter. The Hidden Stressors of Fertility Treatment The fertility journey is filled with hidden stressors that no one tells you the truth about. This isn't intentional deception, but merely a symptom of an incredibly complex process that has too many components to actually prepare you for without overwhelming you before you start. A few of them include: The Schedule The constant scheduling starts to take over your life. Countless appointments and monitoring, adjusting your schedule to ensure you are administering your shots at the right time, and looking at life events you used to take for granted like weddings and birthdays with dread. The Effects You are forced to become a nurse, pharmacist, and practice administrator all to ensure your medication is delivered on time, prepped, and taken. Your body starts to transform as the hormone levels change in response to the medication. Bruising, knots at the administration site, and bloating become something you think about every day. The Administrative Burdens From the beginning, you are constantly going back and forth with the clinic, your pharmacy, and your benefits provider (if you have one), trying to understand what is covered, what you owe out of pocket and why, and when the next bill comes. Even the most prepared budgeter can easily become overwhelmed with the complexity of paying for fertility treatments. The Emotional Toll On top of all of this, you are dealing with one of the most stressful and life altering experiences of your life. Data shows patients who are struggling to conceive report feelings of depression, anxiety, isolation, and loss of control. Depression levels in patients with infertility have been compared with patients who have been diagnosed with cancer (1). The impact of this journey affects your relationships with your family, loved ones, friends, and co-workers. It is easy to become resentful and withdrawn, hiding from the constant reminders society places in front of you that you do not have a child and others do. The Isolation Through all of this, most people don’t have someone to talk to. Evidence shows that patients who go to support groups, seek therapy, or work with coaches, respond more positively throughout the fertility journey. By offloading this burden and sharing the weight of infertility, you can start to take back some semblance of control in an otherwise uncontrollable situation. How Grain Fertility Can Help Grain Fertility was founded because all those stressors are things that we have experienced ourselves. Every day, we strive to help reduce the impact infertility has on your life, working to ensure that you have the support you need and resources you deserve to minimize the impact while maximizing your chances of success. We do this several ways. Our one on one patient empowerment coaching helps walk you through your fertility journey, prepare you for the minutia of treatment, and provide a step by step explanation of whats next. Our empowerment coaching is built around preparing you for milestone events, the biggest parts of the treatment process ranging from egg retrievals to transfers, trigger shots to two-week waits. We can go through your medication and prescriptions with you, provide you with personalized guidance on storage, administration, and scheduling so you don’t get surprised when something comes up. While we cannot replace the feeling of someone being right by your side during the hardest moments, we hear every day from our members how reassuring it is to know a Patient Empowerment Coach is available when you need them. Our application lets you access, organize, and use all of the information you are responsible for during the fertility treatment process, reducing the overwhelming feeling and crippling anxiety that can impact so many patients. We know what it is like to have to remember all of your medications, test results, medical history, and balance the rest of your life. With our application, it makes it easier than ever to put that aside until it is needed, knowing exactly where it is when you need it most. Our coaches have years of experience working for some of the largest fertility clinics in the world. This gives you access to a go-to person who can help answer your questions, work side by side with your clinic and care team to deliver personalized educational materials, and have you feeling more prepared and confident in your journey. Our Patient Empowerment Coaches can help support you on your journey. While there is no guarantee that we can help every single person achieve their dream of having a baby, we are committed to ensuring every single person struggling with infertility has the support they need and deserve. (1) Rooney KL, Domar AD. The relationship between stress and infertility. Dialogues Clin Neurosci. 2018 Mar;20(1):41-47. doi: 10.31887/DCNS.2018.20.1/klrooney. PMID: 29946210; PMCID: PMC6016043.

For many hopeful parents, the journey through fertility treatment can feel like a rollercoaster of emotions, decisions, and financial concerns. The barriers are significant: navigating treatment plans, understanding medical terminology, and facing the high costs of care. For many, these challenges can lead to one heartbreaking decision—quitting treatment altogether. Barriers to fertility treatment like cost and overwhelming nature are the number one reason why people quit Grain Fertility and EggFund were founded to address these very struggles and help patients move forward with confidence by providing comprehensive fertility patient support from diagnosis to graduation. By combining our unique strengths, we are are making fertility treatment more manageable and accessible than ever before. The Founding Stories Grain Fertility was created with a vision to provide expert fertility navigation and coaching, empowering patients with the knowledge and tools they need to make informed decisions about their care. From organizing treatment plans to answering tough questions, Grain Fertility simplifies the overwhelming process of fertility care. EggFund , on the other hand, was founded to tackle the financial burden of fertility treatments. With access to the largest network of fertility-friendly lenders, EggFund helps patients secure flexible financing options so they can afford the care they need without unnecessary stress. Together, these organizations address the two biggest challenges in fertility treatment: financial strain and emotional overwhelm. Grain Fertility and EggFund help support patients from diagnosis to graduation. The Problems Patients Face Fertility treatment can be isolating and complex, leaving patients unsure of where to turn. Studies show that the number one reason patients quit treatment is the combined weight of emotional and financial stress. Without the proper support, the journey can feel too difficult to continue. How Grain Fertility and EggFund Help Grain Fertility provides a personalized experience, offering one-on-one coaching, treatment navigation, and educational resources to help patients feel confident at every step of their journey. Patients gain clarity on their treatment plans and develop actionable strategies to manage the challenges ahead. EggFund eliminates the financial stress by connecting patients with lenders who understand their unique needs, providing peace of mind that treatment is within reach. Their transparent, patient-friendly approach ensures financial options are clear and accessible. When patients work with both companies, they experience a new level of support: Access to comprehensive educational resources to understand treatment options and make informed decisions. Increased awareness of financial strategies to reduce costs and manage budgets effectively. A simplified, supportive journey that empowers patients to stay on track. Why Support Matters Patients who have both financial and educational support are more likely to stay engaged in treatment and achieve their goals. By partnering together, Grain Fertility and EggFund ensure that no patient has to face this journey alone. The result? Patients feel more confident in the direction their journey will take. With their emotional and financial concerns addressed, they can focus on what matters most—building their family. What to Expect Patients working with Grain Fertility and EggFund will benefit from: Expert fertility coaching to guide them through their treatment plans. Flexible financing options to reduce the financial burden. A collaborative approach that empowers patients to make confident decisions about their future. By addressing the key reasons for quitting treatment, Grain Fertility and EggFund are transforming the fertility experience, making it easier than ever to move forward with hope. Watch Our Video Discussion Learn more about how these two innovative companies are changing the fertility journey for patients everywhere. Get quick access to pre-approved fertility loan offers with no impact on your credit by going to https://www.myeggfund.com/ .

Grain Fertility founder and CEO Joe Cody is an IVF dad who went through nearly 4 years of IVF with his wife to have their daughter. Despite the success, he. and his wife still carry the scars of their journey. To help our members who are actively pursuing parenthood though assisted reproductive technologies due to infertility, we reached out to Emily Guarnotta, PsyD, PMH-C, to better understand the emotional impact infertility can have on a person and couple and when to seek additional help. Emily is owner of Phoenix Health and works every day with individuals and couples struggling on their own journey. The Taxing Nature of Infertility Infertility is more than just a medical condition. It can also be an emotionally taxing experience that can leave you vulnerable to high levels of stress, anxiety, and even depression. Even when the physical process of infertility ends, the emotional wounds can continue to linger. Many people find themselves “going through the motions” during treatment, only to be hit with the full weight of their emotions months or even years later. The weight of infertility can hit at any time. If this sounds like you, you’re not alone. What Is Trauma? Trauma occurs when a person experiences a distressing event(s) that overwhelms their ability to cope. It can be the result of a single event or the accumulation of many stressful events over some time. For many couples, infertility is a form of trauma because of the ongoing stress, loss, and uncertainty. Between the repeated cycles of hope and disappointment, the isolation from family and friends who don’t seem to understand, and the lack of control over your own body and future, infertility and the treatment process can certainly be traumatic. This kind of chronic stress can leave deep emotional scars, even if you eventually conceive or find an alternative path. Why Infertility Can Be Traumatic For many, the infertility journey is filled with challenges that can take a serious toll on your emotional well-being. It’s important to note that trauma is a deeply personal experience. Two people on similar journeys may have very different reactions, where one may experience infertility as trauma and another may not. This discrepancy can even occur between partners. While trauma is deeply personal, some of the most common sources of trauma while going through infertility include: The repeated cycle of hope and disappointment – Month after month, you may find yourself hoping for a positive pregnancy test, only to experience heartbreak when you get yet another negative. The emotional rollercoaster can be exhausting and may leave you emotionally numb. Loss of control over your body and future – Infertility forces you to confront the fact that some things are beyond your control. This can be frustrating and disheartening, especially when family and friends are conceiving easily. Medical procedures and invasive treatments – Fertility treatments can be physically demanding, painful, and emotionally draining. Hormone injections, blood draws, ultrasounds, and surgeries take a toll, not just on your body but also on your mind. Some individuals begin to resent their partners who do not have to go through the same physical treatments. Isolation from friends, family, or partners who don’t fully understand – Infertility can feel incredibly lonely, especially when others around you seem to be moving forward with their lives and having children without difficulty. Frustration and resentment toward your partner can also build, especially if you feel like they don’t understand or they have a different coping style. Grief over potential loss – There are so many losses that can occur during the infertility journey, including failed treatments, pregnancy losses, and the fear that you may never become a parent. When Trauma Shows Up Later Many people going through infertility are always focused on the next step. Whether it’s trying another treatment, considering different options, or simply getting through the day. There’s often little time or energy to fully process what they are experiencing. Each disappointment is followed by a new plan and next steps. But when this part of the infertility journey comes to an end, those feelings can come rushing back. This delayed trauma can surface in unexpected ways, sometimes months or even years later. It may appear as: Feeling intense sadness or grief when seeing others’ pregnancy announcements. Becoming anxious or emotional when visiting a doctor’s office. Remembering anniversaries of failed treatments or losses. Struggling with feelings of anger, resentment, or guilt, even if you have since become a parent. Coping with Infertility Trauma Healing from infertility trauma is possible, but it can take time. Here are some ways to start: Acknowledge Your Experience – Give yourself some time to reflect on what you went through. Journaling, meditation, and just time for self-reflection can help. Allow yourself to acknowledge your emotions instead of minimizing them. Your feelings are valid, even if you have a healthy baby. Seek Support – Connecting with others who understand can be incredibly healing. Consider joining an in-person or online support group for individuals who have experienced infertility. These groups can be safe spaces for sharing your experiences and giving and receiving support. Practice Self-Compassion – Self-compassion is the practice of being kind to yourself and letting go of guilt and shame. When you’ve gone through infertility, It’s easy to blame yourself or wonder “What if I had only made a different choice?”. Self-compassion involves recognizing that you were doing your best at the time and being gentle with yourself. Set Boundaries – It’s okay to step away from conversations or situations that feel triggering. You may find that certain topics cause all of the emotions of infertility to come rushing back. You have the right to prioritize your mental and emotional well-being. Grain Fertility can help you navigate the complexities of fertility treatment. Signs You Should Seek Professional Support While some people can work through the trauma of infertility on their own or with the help of loved ones, others may need professional support. Therapy can provide a safe space to process and cope with your infertility journey. You might benefit from therapy if you experience: Feelings of anxiety, depression, or emotional numbness. Difficulty finding joy in everyday life. Strained relationships with your partner, family, or friends. Physical symptoms like difficulty sleeping, headaches, gastrointestinal problems, or chronic stress. Feeling stuck and unable to move forward in your life. If you’re struggling with the emotional trauma of your infertility trauma, know that you are not alone. Regardless of how much time has passed and the outcome, you may still find feelings rushing back. For many, infertility is an experience that is always a part of you. Therapy, support groups, and self-care can all be valuable tools in the healing process. Whether you are going through infertility treatment or it’s in your past, you deserve support, understanding, and compassion. About Phoenix Health Phoenix Health provides online therapy for perinatal mental health, supporting individuals facing infertility, pregnancy loss, postpartum challenges, and other perinatal concerns. Their team of specialized clinicians offers compassionate, evidence-based care to help clients navigate the emotional complexities of parenthood. They proudly serve clients in 40+ states, making high-quality mental health support accessible wherever you are.

In December, Joe Cody, Founder & CEO of Grain Fertility spoke with Amy West, the Principal Director, Advisory Services & Chair for the Women’s Health Tech Initiative for HITLAB, a organization dedicated to exploring the impact of digital health through innovation research. Joe joined HITLAB to discuss "The Fertility Revolution: Sharing Stories of Hope and Driving Innovation," sharing his personal journey, the role of digital health, and the future of fertility innovation. Founder Joe Cody shares his story with HITLAB In this conversation, Joe addresses: His inspiration for founding Grain Fertility, including his IVF journey and advocacy work with RESOLVE. The most promising technological innovations in fertility care over the next five years How digital health can break the stigma around fertility treatments. The connection between fertility and broader women’s health issues. His vision for the next decade in fertility innovation and patient support. Watch the full discussion below:

At Grain Fertility, we believe that no fertility patient should navigate this journey alone. That’s why we’re thrilled to announce our partnership with Arbor Fertility , where patients now have full access to Grain Fertility’s support and organizational tools at no cost for the duration of their care at Arbor. Grain Fertility is proud to support Arbor Fertility patients for the duration of their care. This partnership ensures that Arbor Fertility patients feel informed, empowered, and supported every step of the way—from initial consultation to graduation. How Grain Fertility Supports Arbor Patients Fertility treatment can be overwhelming, but with Grain Fertility’s tools and expert coaching, Arbor patients will have guidance at every stage: Initial Consultation Patients that meet with Dr. Zarek and the Arbor team will have access to Grain Fertility's coaching and educational tools to help understand the fertility process and ensure you have the Information you need to make the best decisions about your care. During Treatment Our Patient Empowerment Coaches, who are trained fertility nurses, provide one-on-one support to help patients navigate medications, procedures, and next steps. Whether it’s answering questions about injections, understanding lab results, or managing appointments, we’re here to help. Graduation & Beyond For patients who successfully conceive, Grain Fertility offers ongoing resources and education on pregnancy after infertility. For those who need additional cycles, our tools help streamline the process, reducing stress and improving communication with providers. The Power of Support in Fertility Care Studies show that patients who receive personalized fertility coaching feel less stressed and more in control of their treatment decisions. Coaching has also been linked to higher patient satisfaction, improved adherence to treatment protocols, and even better clinical outcomes. By reducing the burden on Arbor’s staff, improving patient experience, and helping patients stay engaged in their treatment, Grain Fertility strengthens Arbor’s mission to provide exceptional, patient-centered fertility care. A Personal Full Circle Moment This partnership is especially meaningful to Grain Fertility’s founder, Joe Cody, who grew up in St. Louis. Helping intended parents in Missouri, Illinois, and the greater Midwest through their fertility journey is not just a business milestone—it’s a personal mission. How to Get Started ✔ If you’re an Arbor Fertility patient, talk to Dr. Zarek or your nurses to get free access to Grain Fertility’s tools and coaching. ✔ If you want your clinic to offer similar services, email us at info@grainfertility.com , or visit www.grainfertility.com/clinics for more details. ✔ Not an Arbor Fertility patient but want support now? Schedule a free discovery call with one of our Patient Empowerment Coaches today and take control of your fertility journey. Grain Fertility can help support your journey We’re honored to support Arbor Fertility patients and look forward to helping even more clinics offer personalized, high-touch fertility care.

For many individuals and couples undergoing in vitro fertilization (IVF), the financial burden can be significant. Fortunately, the IRS allows for medical expense deductions that can help offset some of these costs. This guide will explain how IVF medical expenses and tax deductions work, key terms to understand, and an example calculation to help you determine your potential tax savings. Disclaimer: This article is for educational and informational purposes only and should not be considered financial or tax advice. Tax laws and regulations may change, and individual circumstances vary. Before making any tax-related decisions or filing your return, consult a qualified tax professional to ensure compliance and maximize your potential deductions. Knowing what you can deduct can help save you thousands of dollars. Understanding Medical Expense Deductions The IRS allows taxpayers to deduct qualified medical expenses that exceed 7.5% of their Adjusted Gross Income (AGI). IVF is considered a qualified medical expense under IRS Publication 502 , meaning that certain costs associated with treatment can be included in your deductions. What Is Adjusted Gross Income (AGI)? Your Adjusted Gross Income (AGI) is your total gross income (wages, dividends, business income, etc.) minus adjustments such as student loan interest, retirement contributions, and educator expenses. This figure is found on your tax return and serves as the basis for calculating medical expense deductions. What IVF Costs Are Deductible? The following IVF-related expenses can typically be included in your medical deductions: Medical consultations, diagnostic tests, and lab work Fertility medications prescribed by a doctor Egg retrieval, embryo transfer, and associated procedures Anesthesia and surgical costs Medical-related transportation expenses, including parking and mileage (21 cents per mile for 2024) Storage fees for eggs, sperm, and embryos (if they are for immediate medical use) However, expenses related to surrogacy (such as compensation for a gestational carrier or medical expenses for the surrogate) are not deductible since they are not for you, your spouse, or your dependent. Example Calculation: A Couple Undergoing IVF in 2024 Let’s look at an example of how medical deductions might work for a couple undergoing IVF: A couple has a household income of $125,000 (AGI) and for 2024. They had $32,000 in IVF-Related medical expenses. Based on this, the threshold for deductible expenses would be $9,375. (7.5% of AGI = 0.075 × $125,000 = $9,375) To calculate the deductible portion of their medical expenses If they choose to itemize, they would take their total medical expenses of $32,000 and subtract the non-deductible portion ($9,375) to get a total of $22,625 This means the couple can deduct $22,625 as an itemized medical expense deduction. It is also important to note that the couple can also add eligible transportation expenses, such as: Mileage driven for IVF-related medical appointments Parking fees and tolls associated with medical visits For example, if they drove 2,000 miles for all of their IVF appointments in 2024, at 2,000 miles × $0.21 per mile, they can add an $420 in additional deductible expenses to their total medical expenses and costs. The Importance of Being Informed Understanding the tax implications of IVF can help lessen the financial burden of treatment. By keeping thorough records of all medical expenses, prescriptions, and transportation costs, couples can maximize their deductions and potentially reduce their tax liability. Grain Fertility's application and medical expense tracking sheet help make it easier than ever to keep all of this organized. Get Grain Fertility's Free IVF Expense Tracking Sheet with any discovery call All Grain Fertility members have access to these tools, but if you’d like a free copy, simply schedule a free discovery call with one of our Patient Empowerment Coaches and we will provide you with a free download of our Grain Fertility Medical Expense Tracking Worksheet.

Grain Fertility founder Joe Cody recently had the opportunity to join Kate Weldon LeBlanc and Emily Lindblad on the AllPaths Podcast to share his personal journey through infertility and IVF, as well as the work that Grain Fertility is doing to help support patients. Listen to the episode below In this episode, Joe opens up about his family’s four-year fertility journey—one filled with multiple failed cycles, financial challenges, and the emotional toll that so many families face when trying to build their family. They also explore how crucial conversations with loved ones can impact the fertility experience, and how systemic barriers in healthcare make the process even harder for patients. Beyond his personal story, they dive into the work Joe has done since infertility, advocating for greater access to fertility care, better patient support, and a more equitable healthcare system. Listen to the full episode here: Through Grain Fertility, Joe has worked to channel his experiences into helping other patients navigate the complexities of fertility treatment—because no one should have to go through this alone. It is also important to acknowledge the support organizations like AllPaths Family Building has provided for patients for years. You can learn more about their support groups and advocacy efforts by going to https://allpathsfb.org/ .

Note: Infertility can be an emotionally complex journey, often accompanied by feelings of stress and uncertainty. At Grain Fertility, we’re committed to providing resources that empower and support you through this process. This post is part of our Mindfulness and Fertility Treatment series in collaboration with Lily & Bee Fertility , where we will explore practical ways to reduce stress and foster emotional well-being. Other posts in this series include: Finding Clarity with a Fertility Vision Board: Tips From a Fertility Coach Escaping the Fertility Story Comparison Trap Finding Gratitude in the Middle of a Fertility Journey Tips to Improve Your Fertility Mindset Becky Ackerman, founder of Lily & Bee Fertility Coaching , focuses on creating a thoughtful approach to mindfulness and fertility and has been a guiding light for many. With her permission, we’re thrilled to share her insights with you. Working to Cultivate Gratitude Infertility is a deeply emotional journey, often filled with uncertainty and stress. Yet, cultivating gratitude—even during this challenging time—can offer moments of calm and clarity. Research supports the idea that gratitude practices can improve emotional well-being and resilience, providing a way to shift focus from what feels missing to what still holds meaning and positivity in your life. One of the most powerful tools to nurture gratitude is journaling. A fertility journal can become a sanctuary for reflection, helping you acknowledge progress, express emotions, and find joy in unexpected places. Below are 15 thoughtfully crafted prompts to guide your journaling journey, each designed to help you cultivate gratitude amid the complexities of infertility. Journaling can help throughout your fertility journey. Fertility Journal Prompts to Help Cultivate Gratitude Gratitude might feel like an impossible task when you're facing the challenges of infertility, but it's a powerful way to support your emotional well-being. By focusing on positive aspects of your life, no matter how small, you can foster resilience, build connections, and find moments of peace. To get started, grab your fertility journal and choose from these prompts to help cultivate gratitude: What made you smile or brought you joy today? Reflect on even the smallest sources of happiness that brightened your day. What is a quality in yourself that you appreciate? Celebrate the traits that make you uniquely strong. Who are the supportive people in your life? Think about how they’ve shown care and understanding during your fertility journey. What in nature inspires you? Describe something beautiful in nature and why it resonates with you. What brings you joy in your relationship(s)? Focus on the moments of connection and comfort you share with your partner or loved ones. How have you shown resilience? Consider the strength you’ve discovered within yourself during this journey. Is there a special place you cherish? Reflect on the meaning it holds and the experiences you’ve had there. What signs of progress have you noticed? Recognize small victories and what keeps you motivated to continue. What lessons have you learned? Explore how the challenges of infertility have taught you valuable life lessons and can be applied to other aspects of your life. What creative work has impacted you? Recall a book, movie, or piece of art that has brought you comfort or inspiration. What do you appreciate about your body? Celebrate aspects of your physical health, even amidst fertility challenges. What future moments bring you joy? Picture aspects of your envisioned future that fill you with hope and gratitude. What skills or talents enrich your life? Reflect on your abilities and the role they play in your happiness. Have you received exceptional care? Think about the professionals who’ve supported you and what made their care special. What are your favorite quotes? Reflect on why they resonate and how they guide or comfort you. Each of these prompts is a step toward shifting your mindset, uncovering sources of gratitude, and embracing resilience. Whether you write for a few minutes or dive deeply into reflection, your journal can become a vital tool in navigating the emotional landscape of infertility. Would you like to explore more tools or resources for your fertility journey? Grain Fertility offers tailored support to help you find strength and mindfulness along the way. Reach out today to learn more! Grain Fertility coaches can help you during your fertility journey.

Note: Infertility can be an emotionally complex journey, often accompanied by feelings of stress and uncertainty. At Grain Fertility, we’re committed to providing resources that empower and support you through this process. This post is part of our Mindfulness and Fertility Treatment series in collaboration with Lily & Bee Fertility , where we will explore practical ways to reduce stress and foster emotional well-being. Other posts in this series include: Finding Clarity with a Fertility Vision Board: Tips From a Fertility Coach Escaping the Fertility Story Comparison Trap Fertility Journal Prompts to Help Cultivate Gratitude Tips to Improve Your Fertility Mindset Becky Ackerman, founder of Lily & Bee Fertility Coaching , focuses on creating a thoughtful approach to mindfulness and fertility and has been a guiding light for many. With her permission, we’re thrilled to share her insights with you. Finding Gratitude During Infertility? HOW? Navigating fertility challenges is an emotional and complex experience, which makes finding gratitude during infertility hard. The ups and downs can feel overwhelming, leaving little room for positivity. Amid this, the concept of gratitude might seem out of reach. How can you possibly feel grateful when your journey feels so heavy? Your fertility journey can be overwhelming, physically and emotionally, making it hard to feel gratitude. The truth is, sometimes gratitude isn’t immediately accessible—and that’s okay. Taking a break from forcing positivity is perfectly valid. However, if you’re looking for a way to shift your perspective and introduce moments of lightness into your journey, practicing gratitude may offer relief. This post explores how gratitude can serve as a powerful tool during your fertility journey, offering insights into its benefits and practical ways to incorporate it into your life. What Does Gratitude Really Mean? At its core, gratitude is about recognizing and appreciating the positive aspects of life—no matter how small they might seem. While the dictionary defines it as "a kindly feeling because of a favor received," gratitude extends far beyond saying “thank you.” It’s about cultivating awareness and appreciation, even in life’s quieter moments. Why Does Gratitude Matter During Fertility Challenges? Research highlights the profound impact of gratitude on mental and emotional well-being. Here are five ways it can support you during your fertility journey: A Coping Mechanism: Fertility struggles often come with feelings of loss and disappointment. Gratitude allows you to shift focus from what’s missing to what remains meaningful in your life, creating a sense of balance. Emotional Resilience: The rollercoaster of emotions—from sadness to jealousy—can be exhausting. Gratitude helps you uncover moments of joy and connection, fostering emotional strength. Stronger Relationships: Fertility challenges can strain relationships. Expressing gratitude for the love and support from your partner, family, or friends can strengthen those bonds. Self-Compassion: It’s easy to be hard on yourself during this journey. Gratitude encourages kindness toward yourself, reminding you of your resilience and worth. Staying Present: Gratitude is a form of mindfulness that anchors you in the present moment. This practice can reduce stress and help you navigate treatments and uncertainty with greater calm. How to Cultivate Gratitude in Your Daily Life Incorporating gratitude doesn’t have to be complicated or time-consuming. Here are simple practices to get started: Gratitude Journal: Write down one or two things you’re grateful for each day. These can be small, like enjoying your favorite tea, or big, like a meaningful conversation. Gratitude Jar: Drop notes of gratitude into a jar throughout the week and revisit them during tougher moments. Three Good Things Exercise: Before bed, reflect on three positive things that happened during the day, no matter how small. Mindful Appreciation: Use daily routines, like cooking or walking, as opportunities to focus on things you appreciate in the moment. Gratitude Meditation: Find guided meditations online or create your own by focusing on aspects of life you’re thankful for. Gratitude Walk: Take a mindful walk, paying attention to nature, the weather, or simply the ability to move your body. Gratitude Apps: Download apps designed to offer prompts, quotes, and encouragement to build a gratitude habit. The key is consistency. Even dedicating just a few minutes daily can bring noticeable shifts to your mindset, reducing stress and fostering a more positive outlook. Gratitude takes many shapes and can be achieved many ways. Embracing Gratitude on Your Fertility Journey Fertility challenges test even the strongest among us, and it’s okay to acknowledge how hard it is. Gratitude doesn’t dismiss the difficulty of your journey—it complements it by providing space for appreciation alongside the struggle. At Grain Fertility, we understand the emotional toll of fertility treatment. Our Patient Empowerment Coaches are here to help you navigate the journey with empathy and support. Together, we can create a plan to help you feel empowered and connected every step of the way. Grain Fertility coaches can help support you during your fertility journey.

Note: Infertility can be an emotionally complex journey, often accompanied by feelings of stress and uncertainty. At Grain Fertility, we’re committed to providing resources that empower and support you through this process. This post is part of our Mindfulness and Fertility Treatment series in collaboration with Lily & Bee Fertility , where we will explore practical ways to reduce stress and foster emotional well-being. Other posts in this series include: Escaping the Fertility Story Comparison Trap Finding Gratitude in the Middle of a Fertility Journey Fertility Journal Prompts to Help Cultivate Gratitude Tips to Improve Your Fertility Mindset Becky Ackerman, founder of Lily & Bee Fertility Coaching , focuses on creating a thoughtful approach to mindfulness and fertility and has been a guiding light for many. With her permission, we’re thrilled to share her insights with you. Navigating fertility treatment can often feel like an emotional rollercoaster. A fertility vision board offers a creative, empowering way to gain clarity, set actionable goals, and nurture positivity during your journey. Sometimes, we don't know where our journey takes us but we should take in the beauty around us. The Benefits of a Fertility Vision Board Turning Intentions into Actionable Steps While your ultimate goal might be to have a baby, a fertility vision board helps break that aspiration into smaller, actionable steps that you can control. This clarity can provide direction and a renewed sense of purpose. Empowering Your Mindset By focusing on achievable goals and positive imagery, vision boards reinforce a sense of agency and optimism, essential for emotional well-being during fertility treatments. Promoting Relaxation and Stress Relief The act of creating your vision board can be meditative, offering a much- needed respite from the challenges of infertility. Encouraging Positive Thinking Surrounding yourself with affirming images and words helps shift your mindset toward gratitude, hope, and a focus on what’s within your control. How to Create Your Fertility Vision Board Gather Your Supplies You’ll need a poster board, magazines, scissors, glue, and any optional decorations like markers or stickers. Gather your supplies and a take a moment to think through your vision board. Reflect and Plan Spend some time thinking about your goals and values. Becky suggests asking questions such as: What steps can I take to feel good about myself during this journey? What activities bring me joy or relaxation? How can I optimize my fertility naturally? Find and Collect Inspiring Images and Words Search for visuals and phrases that resonate with your reflections. You can cut these from magazines, print them, or write them out yourself. Design Your Board Arrange your materials on the board in a way that feels meaningful and inspiring. Once you’re happy with the layout, glue everything down. Display Your Vision Board Place your finished vision board somewhere visible as a daily reminder of your intentions and the steps you’re taking toward your goals. Your vision board doesn't have to be literal, but reflect your larger goals and desires. Sometimes posting pictures of babies can actually be harmful rather than focusing on the mindfulness of the board. Remember, your fertility vision board is uniquely yours—there’s no right or wrong way to create it. Whether it’s a reflection of self-care, actionable goals, or activities that bring you joy, the process of crafting your vision board can help you find clarity, peace, and empowerment. Creating a fertility vision board is a powerful step toward finding clarity and reducing stress during your journey. To complement this mindfulness approach, Grain Fertility offers Patient Empowerment Coaching, designed to provide the personalized support and guidance you need. Our coaches are trained fertility experts who are here to help you navigate every aspect of your treatment journey—whether it's setting actionable goals, managing stress, or answering your questions. At Grain Fertility, we're committed to supporting you in every way possible, so you can focus on what matters most. Let us be your partner in empowerment and success. Grain Fertility Patient Empowerment Coaches can help support you on your journey.